Taking care of my elderly parents’ health has been a real eye-opener. It’s frustrating because the process can feel cold and confusing.

The biggest problem is the doctor visits. Even doctors who take appointments seem super busy. Quite a few doctors rush through appointments, sometimes only giving a couple of minutes (even with empty clinics), and some even consult while glancing at their phones. It’s disrespectful and makes it hard to feel like they really care. They prescribe medicine without really explaining it or the side effects. These short visits leave us with more questions than answers. Doctors might quickly explain some of their “branded programs” — special services or treatments (with great enthusiasm!)— that seem more focused on making money than addressing our specific concerns.

This lack of communication is stressful for everyone. It is especially hard on my parents. They used to trust doctors completely, but now, after these short visits with no explanations, they’ve become suspicious. They refuse to visit doctors anymore, claiming it’s just a scheme to extort money. I know this thinking only hurts them in the long run, but I can’t blame them entirely. The impersonal healthcare system has fostered this distrust. This worries me and I wonder if people are getting the care they deserve (I mean no one is offering services at a discount or asking for consultation at gun-point)

I know doctors are busy and the system is complicated. But it seems like the human side of caring, once the most noble part of the medical profession, has perhaps become too focused on revenue. It’s been hard, but there have been a few doctors who really listened and explained things. Those moments show me that empathy and care can still be part of healthcare.

Maybe I am being unrealistic in expecting doctors to be therapists on top of everything else. They are highly trained professionals who need to focus on curing illnesses, and sometimes that requires emotional detachment. Honestly, I agree with that. But visiting doctors with my parents is putting me through a lot of tension with all the unknown.

We really need someone to bridge the gap, a middleman or some trusted interpreter who can provide context and answer our questions in a way that’s easy to understand. Even an AI agent for that matter! (this could be an opportunity but also it is quite a sensitive area) Someone to explain the situation, the risks and benefits of treatment options, and just be there to listen to our concerns. That would make a huge difference.

Note: I have tremendous respect for doctors. I don’t intend to insult the profession. The thoughts above are a collection of experiences, possibly not generalizable to all doctors. These experiences are based on my interactions with various specialists in Mumbai, India.